Its all done for the minute

so i have had the operation and all that jazz. Thank god its over for know, when i had all the tests done on "the lump" it came back as one type of cyst which is call a branchial cleft cyst which starts forming from embrio stage and its skin particles that done close over and all attach together and cause a cyst, when they opened up my neck they couldnt find the cyst there suprise suprise and they then thought it was an infection in my limft noide in the neck so the drained all that and took all that out in the operation. That all then got sent off to the lab app it was the size of a golf ball and tests where ran on it. When i got the 1st lot of results back it showed that there were no bugs which was a good sign no cancer nothing so i was happy until the second lot of results came back, showing that i had a cyst of the limft noide not an infection so this means that a cyst could re accor on my neck again down the track because when they had me asleep they didnt now it was a cyst so they didnt remove it all, so i could get another one down the track they think it is unlikey because i spent the week in hopsital with 2 drains coming out of my neck, this would have drainied any access cells left behind (we hope) needless to say when my specalist found this out he got a few ppl in trouble because this is why i had the ultra sound done the ct scan and the biopsey done to ensure that when it got to operation time we had no suprises but in my case we had a big one so yes. So its back to hopsital on monday to get the remaining stiches out which shouldnt hurt considering the last 5 didnt that were holding the drains in, so now i have this nice big dressing on my neck keeping the thing covered and to little things keeping the lil holes closed were the drains were.

So im glad its all over and i got out of hopsital which ended up being like a jail it was that boring no tv nothing and a whole lot of old ppl i was the only girl on the ward and all old men snoring their heads off it was an awesome week.

Have a good weekend take care all!!

YAY ITS NEARLY OVER!!!

So today i had my ct scan and biopsey which were both as scary as anything, it become the day from hell. It all started with the Ct scan and the lady saying ok we are going to inject some blue die into you and i was like hang on hold up and i said to dad no i dont want it with my heart and all i dont know what this stupid die stuff is going to do so i didnt have the die but still had to have the stupid scan which was this big donut looking thing going round and round my kneck taking pictures and i just got to lay there while the bed moved back wards and fowards and so on it kinda made you fell like car sick ish no good. Then it was off to have the biopsey which hurt like hell!! i nearly screamed when the neddle went into my kneck and the man kept moving it so he could try get some of the fluid out it felt grows and saw as having a needle moved up and down in your kneck and only getting like half a neddles worth of shit out when they tell you oww yes we will easly get two needles worth out for you and so most of the lump will go down, so not the case at all the lump is still big annouying but not as saw and i can move my kneck a bit more freely now. But what came of my wonderful 2 hours in hospital was that they are like 99% sure it is a cyst which will deffently need to be cut out and they have to put my to sleep to do that, so im totally freaking out 1 because i hate hospitals at 2 i hate being put to sleep there just the worry of not waking up i know it just to have a cyst removed, but i worry. Also i found out i wont be having it removed till it goes down they wont opperate on it while its so big which is a pain cause i just wont it out now.

But the second half of my day was awesome the sarvo went to a mates house and swam in the pool for like 3 hours we just sat and chat and swam a bit and i got brown lol for once in my life i didnt burn!!

I also am going to do and stick to this time no drinking till christmas day!! i know hard to belive me doin it two months its going to be hard but so far i have done it and farley easly, i havent really had the urge to drink or anything so 12 days into my 55 day challange and im doing really well! i have lasted longer than any other time! everyone has beats that i will only last 2 weeks but clearly i will pass that and a month tops but i will push for the 55 days cause who needs to drink to have fun?? if you do then that i reckon is sad. And you shouldnt need a drink to dance either i reckon but hey each to their own.

take care!

moving on up

Went to oaks day yesterday had the best fun ever was awesome just me and hannah went we got sunburt but it was well worth it, we won money lol.

so the lump is starting to become painfull and i just wont it out im getting over it over the lack of sleep because of it, its because every time i sleep on it; it hurts which wakes me up.

so my fish are still alive and kicking 2 weeks on 1 clean of the tank later and they are still going!! woo yeah go me. the last 4 were dead by now so im doing well lol thanks to the help of a few ppl.

so i was ment to be moving out of home soon and moving in with some mates the house is nearly ready but i dont think i will anymore being at home is good im managaing to save some money at shit so me and mate that were going to move in choose not to any more we have decided we are going to save for our own house. sounds like a big thing but these days with the first home buyers grant go up its better to by your own house and put money you would have spent on rent paying someone else morgage off your own.
so we are hoping by round this time next year to have the money saved up and going looking.

whats around the corner!?

So i went to the specalist about "the lump" and it is a cyst!
so i go and have a ct scan done in 2 weeks and then go back and see him on the 17th nov which i will then get booked in for the operation.
I have to stay in over night which is the down side of things but with my heart prob and stuff they just wanna make sure im 100% ok before they let me go home.

Last night went to daveys first time in a long time i been back there was not half bad 4 a fri night music wasnt to bad but it only started to get good at like 2 30ish. We then went across to flannies and catched up with Erin, Cara, Rhiannen, Heather and Jack who apparently i have met before but dont remember the guy at all, but it was good to see the chicks.

So im all pumped 4 oaks day on thursday going down to pakey for the races which should be awesome getting all dressed up and stuff head on down might have a few drinks but not 2 sure yet trying to not drink for the whole of november which prob wont happen easy but hey its worth a try.

wow im 20!

So today i turn 20.
its kinda scary like know when ppl say how old r u i can say im in my twenties! no longer do i say nineTEEN!! like dont have the teen thing n e more! which mean its time 2 grow up and i have been and people have notcied, which is a start and a step in the right direction.

i was thinking to myself i wanna set some goals that i wish to reach before i turn 21!

- i want to have my course finished and be a qualifed child care worker

- I want to settle down or find someone and kinda settle off the party seen for a bit its like the last 4ish months all i have been doing is going out and getting drunk which is fun but 1 a waste of money and 2 kinda getting bit over it

- i would like to be moved out of home and happy

- i want to have some more money saved up so i can go over seas

- And this year i wanna have the best new years ever! im going away with some awesome ppl and it should be the best fun yes they r making fun of me and skye coz were bring our hair striaghtners but oww well were girls!

- and i wont to have most of my car loan payed off!

i hope i can reach all of these things before my 21st and i know i can as long as i set my mind to it and save my but off.

afta all i am speding my bday with the best bunch of ppl going round!

shake it

so its exactly 1 week till my birthday 2 exciting going to be 20 which is the scary part but im excited!
off to laser force this saturday everyone thinks they will beat me mm sure guys!

so today is 2 years that my grandpa died and 7 since my aunty!
its fells just like yesterday i was in year 12 n found out i lost my grandpa and that my aunty died time just goes so quick but the pain doesnt go away as quick.

I also wish i could figure out the male brain its weird n confusing and i just dont get it!!

you know i could somebody, someone like you

ever felt like your the most unhappiest person and that your sourounded in a sea of the most happiest ppl going around?

like everything you ever thought was good in life turns out 2 be one big lie?

and that all you wanna do it know why?